I had a brain error today.  I almost did it again.  I was obsessed with CNN and anticipating one more woman showing up to accuse Trump.  This one was going to have invincible evidence!

My brain was slipping into old thoughts without my even realizing it.  “I am a victim. I am powerless.  No one will stand up for me.  No one will believe me.”  And besides, I did my own damage in my later years by choosing to seek love and attention from men when all they knew was sex.  I was too young to “get it” and there were enough older men willing to use my ignorance for their pleasure.

Seeing survivors bravely rising – forced to face a wave of misogyny and a predator using shame to keep them in hiding.  I am so proud of their courage.  And thank you to Michelle Obama, Hillary Clinton, Gloria Steinem, broadcasters and pundits of the Republican, Democratic, and Libertarian persuasion, who come to our side and stand with us.  To educate.  

Because we forget there is no way we can be re-traumatized by the words of such a man and others who in ignorance, just don’t understand the issue. 

Thank you, Mr. Trump for not disguising your hatefulness, revealing your misuse of power and your own sad fight with the world and your inner demons.  You misunderstand what your privilege affords you.  I don’t think so.

Today I was blessed to be surrounded by brilliant, smart, and compassionate women who remind me (and I had to be reminded – to be called back to the present moment) that nothing has happened to me today. No one has victimized me today.  Yes, in fact, nothing has happened to me.  Just a reminder that men abuse power.  Just a reminder that there was a time when I ran into such men who abused their power.  Like millions of other women.  And I am a lucky one.  I am alive, healthy and have recovered – you can’t take it from me. 

I am also reminded that I have power at the ballot box.  That is where I express my power.  I won’t be distracted by your shouting, Mr. Trump.  Determined, I will vote for an America that is truly great by virtue of our compassion, diversity, willingness to evolve and look at racism and sexism and homophobia.  We are not there yet, that is obvious.  But we are in the midst of it.

To you courageous survivors, men and women who have been overpowered.  We stand with you, next to you and hold your hand as we march to the ballot box. 

Register to vote.  Go out and vote. Someone will win this election.  By your vote or by your absence.    

Unspeakable shit happens.  Criminal behavior happens.  If we are lucky, we survive.   Our brains are complex and influenced by our thoughts, habits and beliefs.  We can change our experience when we look at our beliefs and measure if those thoughts are working for us.   I know that as an adult I can control what thoughts I feed and what thoughts I can starve and discard. 

Thank you Mr. Trump because you can try to distract me and set me on the wrong trail, but I have been practicing for this very moment.  The only one who can own my thoughts is me and I choose to keep my power.  I thrive.

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